OK, Tumblr, it’s about to get real.
I haven’t written too much before about weight and body image because, since I began running in late 2010, those things haven’t really been an issue for me. I consistently trained for races, which meant lots of cardio and generally eating healthy foods, and in late 2011 I added swimming, cycling and weight-lifting to my workout regimen. I’m a very lucky person in that a moderate amount of exercise and eating well most of the time results in my being generally satisfied with my physical appearance.
I spent a few weeks last summer eating paleo, meaning that I ate fresh, whole foods, like vegetables, fruit, meat, seafood, eggs and nuts, while avoiding grains, dairy and processed foods.
I found myself feeling much better overall and noticed that I never got that horrible bloated feeling after eating, even if I had a large meal. My jeans fit just as well at the end of the day as they did when I put them on that morning. I didn’t even know that was possible!
I even felt confident enough in how I looked to go for a run wearing just a sports bra and shorts on a really hot August day. Flashback to 2011:
This was a one-time thing, by the way! Ha.
A-ny-way, I tell you all this because I’m no longer happy with the way I look. I put on about 10 pounds while traveling from February to May. I know that doesn’t sound like much, but it’s the result of losing a lot of muscle as well as putting on fat.
I haven’t run in nearly two months — my last one was on April 6 in Singapore.
I’ve been super sedentary for nearly one month — I sprained my ankle on May 6 in Thailand.
So, here’s how I look today. (Those are bikini bottoms, not undies, btw!)
And here’s what I weigh. (For reference, I ran my marathon feeling strong and in the best shape of my life at 138 pounds, and I’m 5’6".)
I’m posting this not because it’s fun — it’s very difficult to hit publish!! — but because I’ve shared plenty of fitness triumphs over the past few years of writing this blog, and it’s only fair that I share a low point as well.
I follow many people on Tumblr who candidly share their struggles with weight, body image, eating, exercise, etc. and I’d hate to continue pretending that I don’t struggle with those things, too.
I’m at this point because of a serious lack of exercise over the past few months, but also because of my eating. I indulged in lots of local food everywhere I traveled, sure, but I also found myself binge eating when I was lonely. I ate huge chocolate bars, entire packages of cookies, etc. It wasn’t pretty! I stopped doing that at the end of April. I realized it was stupid and only made me feel worse. I’ve had zero desire to do it since.
Now that I’m home, I have access to all the fresh, healthy food I want. I have no excuse to not eat well. I won’t be able to run or do any high-impact exercise on my bum ankle for a while, but I can work on my upper body and core, and do modified workouts to go easy on the ankle.
Last night, at my final birthday celebration (divorced parents = multiple birthdays!), my dad gave me Everyday Paleo, which is packed with delicious, nutritious recipes, grocery lists, meal plans, exercises and more. I flipped through it and got really excited to start today!
Yeah, it’s May 30, and not the first of the month. It’s a Wednesday, not a Monday. But why wait for some arbitrary “fresh start” day? There’s no better day than TO-DAY.
This is not about losing a certain number of pounds or getting back to the shape I was in at my peak of marathon training — that’s just unrealistic. It’s about feeling better and fitting in my clothes like I did before my trip. (They still fit… kind of… just not super comfortably).
Back when I ate paleo last summer, I looked and felt better than ever. Aaron started eating paleo with me at the time, and he has continued quite consistently! He’s dropped fat and packed on about 15 pounds of muscle since then. I’m excited to start again and see where it takes me.
I plan to eat strict paleo for a month, work out at least 3x a week and weigh in each Wednesday, mostly out of curiosity. I’ll post another photo in the same outfit at the end of June, since everyone loves a good “before and after” (or at least “before and during”). After that, I’ll assess how I feel about eating paleo and either continue it or modify it.
For a great overview of what it means to eat paleo, check out my friend Steve’s article: The Beginner’s Guide to the Paleo Diet.
So… that’s that. Carry on!
Dev on Running 